Male Chefs to Knock Up Something Special

 

They were once the whipping boys of the playground. Labelled 'fairies' for preferring to make a soufflé rather than impregnate a classmate. But over the years a man in the kitchen has become a widely accepted sight. Of course, there remain a minority who refuse to accept this notion, but even the most Neanderthal of male anti-chefs are now being catered for.

 

Nancy boys, sorry, male culinary geniuses, will compete in a series of events in the hope of being crowned the “Celebrity Male Chef Who, Although He’s Obviously a Great Cook, He's Also Masculine Champion Of The Year" award. The inaugural competition will see top celebrity chefs from around the world compete in gruelling tasks from comparing cuticles to answering questions on contemporary women's magazines.

 

Ramsay is confident that his invisible bazooka will help him succeed in the tournament.

 

The first round draw for the competition is as follows:

 

Hide and Seek Contest (Best of Three)

Gary Rhodes v Ainsley Harriot

Rhodes's spiky hair may be his downfall in this one.

Prediction: Big A.

 

Ice Cream Eating Contest

Marco Pierre White v Anthony Worrall Thompson

Thompson appears to have more storage room.

Prediction: The fatter fella with the double-barrelled will nab it.

 

Who Can Make the Prettiest Pizza Topping Contest

Jean-Christophe Novelli v Jamie Oliver

Novelli is much prettier, according to women...

Prediction: Viva La France!

 

Who Can use the Most Swear Words in a Single Sentence Contest (not including the word 'fu*k')

Gordon Ramsey v Rick Stein

With the all important ban of the f-word, this could be Stein's chance to show he's the real mother fu*king deal.

Prediction: Looks like another chef will make Ramsay cry.

 

The competition will be aired on Bravo TV at 1.15am on January 12^th 2008.

 

* The "Celebrity Male Chef Who Although He’s Obviously a Great Cook, He's Also Masculine Champion Of The Year" award reserves the right to change the card prior to the event.   JG